"One might define adulthood as the age at which a person learns he must die and accepts his sentence undismayed."

"To be matter of fact about the world is to blunder into fantasy -- and dull fantasy at that, as the real world is strange and wonderful."

"Always listen to experts. They'll tell you what can't be done and why. Then do it."

"The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive."

"People who go broke in a big way never miss any meals. It is the poor jerk who is shy a half slug who must tighten his belt."

"Progress isn't made by early risers. It's made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something."

"The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins."

"I think of myself as an intelligent, sensitive human with the soul of a clown, which always forces me to blow it at the most important moments."

"Pain makes man think. Thought makes man wise. Wisdom makes life endurable."

"Until you walk a mile in another man's moccasins you can't imagine the smell."

"If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late."

"What we do for ourselves dies with us. What we do for others and the world remains and is immortal."